Adi Da Archives

Devotees' Own Responsibility for Taking Adi Da Abuse: Where Do Excuses End in the Adidam Cult?

Posted in 2004

Former Daist, I am glad to hear you finally left the Adi Da cult after 30 years, and I have been reading your recent posts about the guru’s extreme and outrageous behavior with interest.  However, there is something I’d like to explore with you, if you’ll indulge me for a moment.  Let’s walk together through a brief and simplified narrative of the experiences of a hypothetical devotee who, like you, became involved with Frank Jones aka Bubba Adi Da Free John 30 years ago in approximately 1974.  Please grant me the poetic license to call this character “you,” although I freely admit that your own history may differ from his.  I want you to look at his history with me from a certain perspective that I will create, to see if it sheds any light on the issue of when it becomes appropriate to start assigning some of the responsibility for getting exploited by the guru to the devotee himself.  I notice that you, like many others who post here, have not addressed this particular issue.

It is not my intent to place the primary blame for Adi Da’s abuses on the “victims,” because that blame lies squarely on the shoulders of Franklin Adi Da himself, without whom this adventure in delusion would not have taken place.  Let’s also acknowledge that some of Frank’s lieutenants were or are corrupt and/or deeply misguided as well, and without them he could never have pulled off what he did.  What I want to talk about here are the sheep, the regular Daists outside the inner circle like you who put up the money and the free labor and the years of commitment to build Adi Da’s cult into what it is today.

Let’s step back to the early to mid -70’s, where the Vietnam War is just winding down and the youth of America have gone through a period of intense rebellion against just about everything that the establishment had to offer. Among other things, they have lost faith in their government, their parents, their traditional Western cultural values, and the Christianity or Judaism they grew up with. Everything seems to have been turned upside down in the last decade, but nothing has yet replaced the old order. 

Drugs are everywhere, opening the windows of perception to brief glimpses of another way of seeing the world, one that holds the promise of liberation from the mundane and confining life that has come to typify post-WWII  America. Powerful drug experiences open people up to the idea that not only is there more to Reality than meets the eye, there is also the possibility to experience that Reality in what seems like a direct and primal way.  Young people who hunger for a different Truth and a different way of life than the one that brought them the war and the hypocrisy they see all around them see potential in the religions of the east, and are drawn to the meditative dimension of those religions that resonates with their drug induced experiences.

Let’s say you’re 19 or 20 years old back then, seeking answers to all the big questions that haunt us as we come of age. All around you there are hip people who are getting involved with eastern philosophies that claim to have the answers you’re looking for, answers that are based on something more profound than just accepting nominal religious beliefs. These teachings talk about literal transformation and liberation of the human being – enlightenment.  Young people are dropping out of the mainstream to pursue this enlightenment, and to live in a communal way that promises more than just a lifetime of seeking for the acquisition of material things.

Somehow or other in the midst of this, you come across the guru Franklin Albert Jones, who writes about all the things you’ve read in other books, but also describes in detail an incredible spiritual adventure that he allegedly went through himself. He describes a realization that he says is at least equal with, if not beyond anything that anyone else has ever experienced. On the basis of this, you decide to go and live with him, to seek the enlightenment he claims to be able to offer others. Maybe you also experience something extraordinary in addition to (or in lieu of) reading a book. You see a flash of light coming out of his picture (must have been some good acid that day, huh :-). Or, maybe you just decide to follow a lover or friend who’s gone to live with the Maha Siddha himself.

Strange things happen when you finally meet the Guru. The strict lifestyle you read about in the books is periodically abandoned for partying, and it gets pretty crazy. However, the orgies and drinking aren’t much different than what’s going on all around you in major cities throughout the world. The Guru claims he’s doing these crazy things to teach you a lesson about how these things are just the habits of the “usual man” and have no place in spiritual life, or in the life of the “man of understanding.” The Guru puts a halt to all of this partying in late 1976, saying that the lessons are over. From now on, he will live as his true self, instead of just reflecting devotees’ bad habits back to them. Before this, he had to focus on this particular way of shining the sunlight over the well to amplify your hidden Narcissistic tendencies, so you could recognize the activity of self-contraction and transcend it. Something like that, anyway!

So far, this seems pretty reasonable (back then, anyway). It might not be working to liberate anyone, but it seems like a possible explanation for all the weird behavior that is rumored to be taking place around the Big Guy, or maybe even that you’ve seen around him. As long as you didn’t look too closely at what went on, and didn’t have too much personal contact with the Big Guy, maybe there was something believable about all of this.

Years pass by. The Guru now keeps his distance from all of the sheep, those worker bees who keep the community going by tithing and performing incessant service. He transforms himself into a religious Icon of sorts, and introduces a devotional lifestyle to keep the sheep focused on him, without the necessity of actually spending much time with them. He interacts with them only on formal occasions, meditating with them or giving talks, in a setting that emphasizes ceremonial pomp and garb that makes it clear he’s someone really special. He becomes an Object. Once again, this can be seen as an accommodation to the beginner level of practice of all the devotees, who have failed to “understand.” The contradictions between what the Guru has become, and where he started from, are readily apparent.

Yes, this all seems a little odd, but as another form of lesson, maybe you can still buy it (not now in hindsight, but back then). So, as a devotee, maybe you continue to hang with the program, even though it’s become a little strange.

A few more years pass. Remember now, you are a sheep who is busy living your devotional life and serving around the clock. You’ve maybe heard some rumors about the Master that are a little odd, maybe not, but these don’t particularly occupy you. There are a lot of things you don’t really like about the community and its hierarchy that upset you more directly, but you figure this is all part of the test. So, you do your best to dismiss every serious doubt you have as resistance, thinking it’s just another egoic reaction to the practice and a failure to live up to the Guru’s demand for you to surrender.

One morning, you wake up and bring in the newspaper to read at breakfast. There’s a huge bolded headline about a “sex slave” and your Master’s face is plastered all over the front page. You are just shocked. How could this be? What kind of insane thing is going on here?

You are outraged, and are immediately called to defend the Master, who’s gone into seclusion in Fiji, because you’ve failed him once again. You denounce those terrible people who are saying these things about Him and beat yourself up because you know it’s really all your fault.

Months pass by, and there are more newspaper articles and TV shows. Twenty five people or thereabouts make allegations of all kinds about the Beloved Master. They say unthinkable things about him. Horrible. Some of these people are real assholes who are just out to get money in your opinion, and they are in turn exploiting the hurt and pain of weaker people who are feeling the way they do because they failed to practice and couldn’t handle the heat.

There’s quite a few people saying things that sound like extreme versions of events you’ve heard a little gossip about, but chose to ignore. Some of these dissidents were among the leadership of the community at one time, and you know they had access to information you didn’t, and spent more time around the Master than you did. However, you are quite certain that they are also tainted by all kinds of ulterior motives (yes, my friends, these were some dark and evil characters :-).

It all just seems so horrible, because you are certain the Master is enlightened, and that everything he’s doing is a form of teaching. You’ve always interpreted everything he did that way, and are shocked that these former friends of yours no longer see his activities in that light. The media are crude sensationalists (duh) and they have no clue about real spiritual life, anyway. Why, they’ve never even heard of the “crazy wisdom tradition” and wouldn’t know a Siddha from a televangelist! They don’t understand the profound nuances of the Master’s teaching work, and now it’s being distorted and belittled in an arena that’s been designed for 15 second sound bites. You’re certainly not going to listen to anything the media has to say.

All of this excitement and defensiveness preoccupies you. Maybe you subliminally wonder if there’s anything true about the characterization of the Master that these dissidents are promoting, but this gets ignored. Maybe you don’t even let a doubt cross your mind. It’s quite certain in your view that these critics are either reactive, corrupt, just don’t want to practice, or don’t really understand the practice or the way the Master works. It’s all so unfair, and so biased.

You also get a letter in the mail from the dissidents that talks about the psychological dynamics in the cult, and pointing out the fact that the Guru is an Idol who has taken everything from everyone for his own benefit. It says his actions are not a form of teaching, but reflect his own preferences and character flaws. Legal declarations are filed by people like Andrew Parker and Padi Duff regarding the misuse of funds that inure to the Guru’s benefit.

You know, however, the the motives of the people who wrote the letter aren't perfectly pristine, so you don’t take the letter very seriously at all. Maybe you just throw it in the trash. Besides, the Guru has always criticized cults and you are absolutely certain you are not a cult member. Mark Miller and others keep calling the community a cult and this is obviously over the top. Besides, who cares if the Guru takes all the money from the community anyway. That’s the Master's prerogative and he certainly deserves everything he can get since he's the World Teacher and has made so many sacrifices for his devotees.

Maybe you don’t even go through any or all of this thought process, but just prefer to ignore everything because it’s so obviously wrong.

Finally, after a number of months, by late ’85 everything dies down and all the hoopla passes. The Big Guy comes out of seclusion, has his breakdown, and blames you and all of your fellow devotees for the way you handled this crisis. He’s back on the offensive, beating you down again. You know inside yourself that some of his criticisms are true of you, so you accept them and vow to become more devoted to your “practice” in the future. You fixate on your own shortcomings, but never ask him why he ran away and hid in seclusion when charges were leveled against him, never ask him why it is that he blames you for all these problems, and never ask him about any of the allegations the dissidents made about his own personal conduct and motivations.

You never consider the fact that the Big Guy was probably scared shitless by all that occurred, and was also likely subsequently overcome with guilt. Even after he breaks down and goes on a self-proclaimed (and self-named) “Yajna of Pennance” it doesn’t occur to you that somewhere, somehow this guy knows he's done some very ugly shit that he needs to punish himself for. Why else would he call it a Yajna of Pennance?  With all potential plaintiffs paid off however, he avoids accountability once again and slowly, things go back to normal. Guilt passes and the exploitation begins anew.

Meanwhile, your head is still in the sand. You then stay in the community another 15-20 years, knowing full well that all kinds of things that are, well, a little odd are happening around the Guru. The allocation of extraordinary resources to meet the Guru’s personal whims and desires continues. The things he initially said he did only as lessons to teach you continue, and now are less well hidden than before. The “theater” (sexual and otherwise) around Beloved takes a real toll on those who participate, leaving some traumatized. Long-timers learn to keep their distance from him and migrate to the fringes of the community.

The themes of Beloved’s teaching work are repetitive, and always geared to his own benefit and enforcing his dominance over others. He is moody and unstable, complaining constantly about the smallest frustrations. He continues to expand upon his function as a crazy wisdom teacher and talks more about being a tantric, something he never claimed in the early days. You hear enough rumors about strange things going on to know that something’s not quite right.  You gradually discover that there are a lot of questionable things that have always gone on, from the start of the community, and after considering the repetitive pattern they represent it is almost impossible to conclude that they are not reflections of Beloved’s own preferences, rather than the needs of devotees.  But by now, these activities really don't bother you all that much, because you’ve been a believer for so long.  You decide that it’s all part of the Divine Lila, and that Beloved’s realization has nothing to do with the body-mind anyway. Transmission is his only real Function, and the rest of what he does is only meant to alternatively test and attract his devotees, just like Krishna and the Gopis. You just can't judge Adi Da by his behavior.

People come and go by the thousands, and few around the Guru demonstrate anything that looks like true spiritual maturity or transformation. In fact, the people that are supposed to be the most advanced in their practice are the worst people in the community, as far as you can see.  The inner circle is completely corrupt.  You figure that maybe it seems this way to you because you are using “conventional” standards, whereas Beloved obviously is looking at something more fundamental and deeper in these people that you can’t grasp (yeah, like the size of their tits or the degree of their willingness to blindly do whatever he wants them to do to protect and enrich him).

Many who leave the group report feeling hurt by it all and have difficulties reintegrating into the world outside, but if you even hear about this at all you remain certain that this is just because they weren’t really up to the practice anyway. They are failed cases, and shouldn’t have approached the Master if they weren’t ready for the fire of his “Grace” (aka abuse). If they got hurt, it was their own fault. They were warned what the practice was about. It’s not about therapy, it’s about ego-transcendence, so fuck-‘em.

Then finally, after nearly three decades you start to wake up. One way or another, the light starts to come on, and you start to see things differently. Now you say, “Hey, maybe this whole adventure I’ve been on wasn’t what good ol’ Bubba said it was, after all! The inner circle people really are obnoxious and corrupt, and maybe even Beloved himself is corrupt and deluded as well. As for me, I’m not enlightened yet and I’m about 50 years old now. Looks like I’ve been screwed here!!”

So finally you leave, maybe posting to a anti-Da website and complaining about how messed up the community and Frank are. Now you make allegations about lots of outrageous things and talk about hetero guys being anally penetrated at the Guru’s command and humiliated in all kinds of ways until they’re easier for Big Frank to control and manipulate. You insinuate that maybe there's been some very serious criminal activity of one kind or another.  Of course, you’ve been on notice for many years that these or similar kinds of things were going on, and yet you stayed in the group, helping to support and expand it so that others could “benefit” from this kind of “spiritual” activity.

Now, after we read your posts, we’re supposed to be outraged at this horrible organization, yet sympathetic to you who are nearly 50 years old and want to characterize yourself as an “innocent victim.”

So, here’s my question. Where do we start to ask ourselves about the devotee’s responsibility in all of this? When do we say, “OK, up to this point you were a sincere seeker, and were taken advantage of by a deluded guy who was a little older and shrewder than you. We don’t blame you for that, based on your age and the turbulent times you grew up in (late 60’s, early 70’s).  Gurus were a new phenomenon and everyone was following one – even the Beatles. Yes, Frank’s books had you convinced of his enlightenment so thoroughly that by the time you met him you would have let him get away with just about anything.  And that’s exactly what he did.” 

All right, for at least some period of time I’ll grant you that it was possible to think there was maybe something real about the Master’s scene, given your youth and the times we lived in.

But where was the point that you were on notice that something was way off base?  When did you become responsible for continuing to believe ridiculous explanations for all kinds of activities that served to take advantage of you and others?  Your own Guru and many other Gurus all over this country got into some very exploitative behavior, and this was well publicized and made plain in ways that were easy for everyone to understand.  The same patterns were repeated everywhere.  But you failed to see the obvious, year after year.

What was in it for you that corrupted your common sense and your basic integrity?

Where was the line crossed where you really have to take responsibility for your own continued participation in Frank’s scam, and perhaps even accept that you were a facilitator of it, depending on exactly what you did for him?  At some point, everyone in the group was on notice about Frank’s exploits to some degree, although I realize that Frank and his cronies have done the best they can to cover up his past abuses from newbies. 

Even if we ignore Frank’s abuses of self and others, how much insight does it really take to see that he is running a cult that worships him as God Incarnate, despite all of his rhetoric to the contrary?  Not much, I don’t think.  But we all fell for it at some point, and that’s something we each need to deal with in our own way.

So, forgive me if I’m not terribly sympathetic at this point with the idea that you were a completely blameless and innocent victim for these last 30 years.  At some point you have to take responsibility for your own contribution to the mess that was created.  You played along with Frank’s game well into middle age, and were warned by any number of people that it was an abusive cult.  While Frank and his inner circle are clearly more culpable than the sheep they fleeced, and deserve to pay for the fraud they perpetrated, we are all responsible to some degree for what happened to us.  And that’s what I think you need to open your eyes to, my friend.