This is a personal letter from Mark Miller to Susan (last name unknown), a family member of an Adi Da devotee. This letter describes the immersion of devotees in a mythology about Adi Da that is a key component that allows the cult to function. It was written during a period of time that followed widespread media coverage of Adi Da that led many family members of Daist to have serious concerns.
September 17, 1985
Dear Susan,
Thanks for the letter about your cousin and Da Free John. Yes, I do know who your cousin is, although I haven't spent much time around him. Yes, I'm quite sure he knows that the kinds of things you read about in the newspapers have gone on around DFJ. However, his interpretation of those events would be much different than mine. It isn't surprising that he would outright deny the legitimacy of the accounts in the articles when you ask him about them, since you are an outsider and are presumed to lack sufficient "spiritual maturity" to understand the true nature of DFJ's actions. It is also not surprising that he would call the people speaking out in the media "a group of disgruntled liars." You should realize, though, that more than 25 people have shared their negative views of DFJ with the press, including many who were very close to him. This group can't be dismissed so easily.
Let me emphasize that your cousin does know at the very least that the kinds of incidents described in the newspapers were common around DFJ, even if he was not aware of the specific events or if he interprets them differently. In addition, your cousin is probably aware of other similar occurrences that have not yet been made known to the public but would be at least as disturbing as what you've read.
The revelation that just took place in the media is unlikely to have much immediate effect on your cousin or other committed devotees. They will continue to explain away DFJ's abuses until the right moment comes (if it ever does), when something about their whole involvement with DFJ just doesn't work for them any more. It will probably take something more personal for most people to doubt the teaching or their practice. Then, they may be open to interpreting DFJ differently. Or, even then, they may just ignore their doubts and carry onward. The media circus that just transpired is likely to galvanize devotees against us “dissidents” and rally them around the Master in the short term. Later, when all the excitement has passed, I do think the groundwork we have laid will ultimately contribute to some people waking up. It’s too soon to tell for sure.
To continue with answering your questions, the essence of what makes the whole phenomenon of DFJ and his community possible is the collective commitment of all involved to mythologizing everything associated with DFJ. His words and actions are consistently interpreted as lilas or divine acts, regardless of what they appear to be when viewed plainly. Dysfunctional, abusive, and inconsistent behaviors are explained away as the paradoxical expressions of an enlightened being, designed to teach and transform others. Devotees inject their spiritual fantasies and expectations into their perceptions of DFJ and his behavior in a habitual way that gets reinforced by others in the community. Their vision becomes clouded and their discrimination is compromised because of this. The degree to which individuals do this, and the way they do it varies, but it is a fundamental characteristic of those within the group.
This myth-making activity becomes habitual and unconscious in those who are most closely involved with DFJ. I have also seen this process operating in people who've never even met DFJ, but who've deeply bought into the image created in his books and tapes. As I see it, everything associated with DFJ, including his books, his talks, his manner of living and his evolution into a religious icon over the past 5 years or so all work together to justify and recruit people into the "esoteric" practice of DFJ mythologization. All of the things that DFJ has called "agency" function to facilitate that activity and harness it to DFJ's personal benefit. Everything he does is incorporated into a marketing plan designed to sell the idea that he is a larger than life superman who is the greatest spiritual figure in history.
Once people have become involved in the practice of myth-making, all kinds of abuses and inappropriate developments are possible, both intentional and unintentional. I don't see DFJ as particularly evil, but more as deluded and irresponsible. Negligent is another word that comes to mind. DFJ vigorously pursues his own self-interest and the fulfillment of his desires and fantasies at the expense of others, all under the guise of spiritual teaching. He tramples on devotees in the process, and many suffer ill effects as a result. He exploits the high-minded aspirations of sincere people and harnesses them for his own gain. Many suffer from a derailment of their lives and lose years worth of precious opportunities because their whole existence gets turned upside down in the process of "serving the Master." Others suffer psychological difficulties and confusion as a result of DFJ's mind games and exploitation of them, facilitated by their indoctrination into a belief system that undermines their discrimination.
The person most involved in the myth-making process, and the one who started it all, is DFJ himself. He interprets everything in his life in self-serving, grandiose and supernatural terms. So much of what he claims about himself and what he has allegedly achieved on a spiritual level are things that supposedly occurred in the unseen spiritual dimensions of existence where no one can confirm or deny his assertions. As a corollary to this, whenever something goes wrong and a "common sense" explanation will not suffice, DFJ interprets the problematic event in a cosmic way that covers his butt and makes him look like a selfless spiritual superhero.
In yet another form of butt covering, DFJ requires that devotees worship him as a unique and supreme revelation of God in human form, while at the same time criticizing them for doing so. He draws distinctions between their actual cultic worship of him and idealized concepts about "correct" worship of him that are operationally meaningless, and have little fundamental effect on devotees' relationship to him. He says that his proclamations of Divinity are “ecstatic speech,” and they are not about him personally being God in the flesh. To interpret them in a way that does not grant him unique and unprecedented status, however, requires one to completely butcher the English language.
If you look at the actual relationship of DFJ to his devotees, rather than buy into the smokescreen of his words, it is obvious he is being treated as a deity who is above and superior to all other human beings. There is also no doubt that he claims to be the most enlightened spiritual figure in history; greater than Jesus, Buddha, or Krishna; and he demands that people treat him that way.
You mentioned that you didn't understand how all the things I said about the group and DFJ could be true if intelligent people like your cousin and myself were involved. What happens is that you develop a blind spot when dealing with anything relating to DFJ, and to some extent in ancillary areas. With respect to most aspects of your life, you continue to be a largely normal and rational person. So it's not like you have to be a glassy-eyed automaton to be trapped in a cult. That's the popular picture of cult members, but I doubt it's true of very many people in ANY cult. There's a few people like this in DFJ's group, but most people are relatively ordinary, albeit with a blind spot that obscures their discrimination regarding DFJ.
The fact is, sometimes people who are intelligent but not street smart can't see the forest for the trees. I know that when I was 19 years old I bought into the extraordinary claims made in DFJ's autobiography (The Knee of Listening) and appreciated his dharma (if you can really call the dharma his) to the point where I didn't see the obvious when I met him - i.e. that DFJ was extremely irresponsible and was exploiting people to satisfy his whims and fantasies.
By the time I met DFJ and saw things about him that would previously have caused me to reject him out of hand, I was already sufficiently indoctrinated to assume that anything he did was a form of teaching. This, plus the intensive peer pressure and "encounter group" tactics used on me when I first joined the group helped reinforce a belief system with two mutually supportive tenets. Firstly, DFJ was believed to be a perfectly enlightened being whose bizarre and apparently abusive actions were all a form of teaching work and did not disprove his claim to enlightenment. Secondly, doubts and negative reactions to DFJ were to be surrendered (i.e. released and ignored) since they were only signs of the ego's resistance to spiritual practice, and symptoms of the avoidance of relationship by Narcissus (i.e. the unenlightened ego fixated on it's own sense of separate existence). These two themes set up a system of circular reasoning that is self-reinforcing, once you truly believe in it.
Although this circular logic and belief system goes a long way towards insulating DFJ from criticism within the group, he also tries to hide much of his more exaggerated behavior from those whose commitment to him (and willingness to both tolerate and be taken advantage of by him) is not as strong as those in his inner circle. People in the inner circle have demonstrated that they are thoroughly indoctrinated into the belief system about DFJ, and at the same time DFJ has found them to be either attractive sexually, entertaining, or functionally useful to him. The people close to DFJ keep secrets about him from the general membership, as you have seen revealed in the newspaper articles you mentioned. They have no problem whatsoever lying to cover up for him, based on the idea that people outside the inner circle aren't mature enough to understand “the way DFJ works,” nor to interpret his actions properly.
Because of this, DFJ has been able to get away with just about anything. If he were a fundamentally evil or violent person (and I don't think he is) the situation in the community could be very dangerous. As it is, I think he's more deluded and psychologically messed up than violent or malicious. His violent tendencies appear limited to wife-beating, as far as I know, so men like your cousin are probably OK. Mostly, DFJ is naive, self-indulgent, and irresponsible. He is an amoral sociopath who can be cynical or indifferent about his followers and their human frailties. He goes through huge mood swings and alternates between periods of extreme self-indulgence and exaggerated discipline. Others suffer because DFJ's weaknesses are amplified by the power he has within his little fantasy world, and their own lives are impacted by his personal instability and dysfunctional behavioral patterns. Power corrupts, and DFJ’s life is a good example of that.
The community is at root a society devoted to glorification and myth-making in relation to DFJ, who is truly the ultimate example of Narcissus, the mythical figure DFJ uses to describe those who are unenlightened. This supreme Narcissist requires the constant adoration of not only himself, but also of everything associated with him -- his properties and possessions (including the holy sites), and the murtis (pictures) of him, etc. These inanimate objects serve as extensions of his huge ego, and the construction of them and/or worship of them serve to usurp huge amounts of devotees time and money.
DFJ is remarkably spoiled. He gets showered with both attention and gifts, and his every whim is taken as a Divine Commandment. He gets his way virtually all of the time. Yet, he still whines and complains incessantly, and never stops criticizing the efforts of those who seek to please him.
Anyway, let me get to your final question. Once people leave the group, there is no guarantee they will stop the "esoteric practice" (ha ha) of DFJ mythologization. That is just one reason why some people you've met who leave the group still believe in all kinds of nonsense about DFJ. It can be difficult to see all of the ways in which habitual mythologization is operative and to understand the full range and scope of its influence. Waking up can take time. Many can't seem to develop much insight into their delusions and commitment to myth-making about DFJ, beyond identifying the crudest and most obviously cultic level of it. This is why some of the group's beliefs and assumptions are retained indefinitely by many people, even long after they leave.
The funny thing, though, is that this myth-making activity I’ve described really is an "esoteric" practice in some sense. It truly is "hidden," as it is largely unconscious and almost entirely uninspected in the community, despite DFJ's frequent criticism of cultism. He superficially criticizes some aspects of cultism, yet at the same time creates an entire culture devoted to it. It is remarkable that he is able to focus everyone’s attention on what he writes and says, rather than what he does and how he lives.
DFJ also never gets to the core issue, which is the fact that he is an ordinary human being like everyone else and should not be afforded the unique luxury of being beyond accountability. If he really wanted to end the cultic game surrounding him he could easily make some very practical changes in the way he lived and the way he related to others. Of course, this is the last thing he actually wants.
Living like a regular person would effectively undermine most of the cultism involving DFJ, but it would also force him to relate to others in a way he has been afraid of. He would then have to participate in relationships with true peers who require that he be a responsible human being and face the consequences of his actions without appeal to an absurd belief system that gives him license to explain away his mistakes and faults. He would have to face criticism and rejection, and lots of it!
The problem now is that if any devotee living in the community wasn't cultic in their relationship to DFJ, they would soon be pushed out of the group because they weren't committed enough and weren't "in right relationship to the Master." I saw this happen many times. DFJ has thus insulated himself from meaningful criticism and from much of the ordinary feedback that one would get from friends and adversaries. He does this through his own actions and choices, and through the protective mechanism of the extremely cultic inner circle he has created.
DFJ and those close to him are careful to test people's commitment to the "practice" of myth-making before they let them get too close to DFJ personally. DFJ has been pretty careful most of the time about who he messes with. Some people, however, wake up from the fog of his cult belief system at a later time and get very upset about what he's done to them while they were asleep. That's what is going on this year in the media, etc. He is reaping what he has sown.
I hope this addresses your questions, Susan, and that it helps you to understand what your cousin is involved with. It’s a messed up fantasy world, but I do not believe it to be violent or physically dangerous for men, at least. Don't give up on your cousin, but you also need to accept the fact that he has made a choice to follow DFJ and won't leave until he's ready to do so. And that may never happen.
Regards,
Mark Miller